Unfeeling
- Trevor Roberts
- Feb 16, 2017
- 1 min read
When boys are brought into the world and raised to be men, the system of raising them that we have in place neglects them in many ways. The most damaging case of neglect, in my opinion, is the way we teach them emotional control. I have always maintained that If I could give boys one piece of advice it would be to never lose the ability to cry. Some cry more than others. Some are more sensitive. But this notion that men are supposed to always feel in control over their emotions and show none of them can actually have a reverse effect, leading to an adult man seeming to be in control. Internally falling apart in complete isolation, risky behavior and drug/alcohol abuse usually accompany. Chin up. Brush it off. Stop crying. Be a man. I’ve heard all of those growing up as I’m sure many other men have. Despite society stressing stoicism on men less and less as the years progress, The pressure to be unfeeling can seem never ending and still continues to exist despite changing attitudes on what constitutes a man. This pressure exists almost exclusively among heterosexual men. Don’t lose your ability to cry. Ugly things begin to take hold once you forget. The weight of whatever tormented you before you forgot could have easily been lessened by a completely natural bodily reaction to emotional pain; but after years of pushing those feelings away they turn to rage, and many times you turn that rage on yourself.
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