Javaris Gets Pegged
- Javaris Temple
- Dec 19, 2016
- 3 min read
I know how that sounds from the title and just for the record I DID NOT fuck him...Her?..Shim? I don't know gender pronouns that well and honestly there are too many and I'm a very busy person. See! Look at how busy I am! So, so, so busy! Anyway, last weekend I went to a Christmas-themed house party hosted by one of my comedian friends, Casey. Oh yeah, I do stand-up as well. Well, really, I’m just an open mic'er with a struggling cocaine addiction, but that’s another thing. I gotta stop incriminating myself online like Zucc ain't out here ready to swing ban-hammers like some-commie, Jack Kirby created, wet-dream of a Norse god. Night of the party comes and I’m cross-faded out of my mind. Stumbling around Casey’s house with a half-eaten slice of hot'n'ready pizza in one hand and a jack and coke in the other hand trying to wax poetic with other comics about comedy. I still don't know why wearing pants on stage is a staple in comedy and no one there could answer me. Id like to wear shorts on stage without another comic raising their eyebrows at me, y’know. At some point in the night, I’m too drunk to stand so I made my way outside to a fire pit Casey had going in his backyard. There, I met Emelia. Emelia was a tall, slender, white chick with broad shoulders and a very strong jaw. Normally, this would be an indicator of a trans-gendered individual, but it was dark outside and I was too lost in the sauce to notice at the time. She sat down next to me at the fire pit and we strike up a conversation about another comedian at the party she was really into. Some chick named Jasmine; She aight, I guess. I tried to hype Emelia up to go talk to her but she kept giving reasons not to. So, I abandoned the subject. Then she followed up with,"Really, I just wanna peg the shit out of her". I’ve never sobered up so fast in my life after hearing that. I mean, its not everyday you hear a chick speak passionately about pegging, amirite? "There's just something cool about knowing I could fuck the shit out of chick as good as a dude", was one of the things she said that stuck out to me in my drunken stupor. Another comedian friend of mine, Tim overheard and joined in the conversation. We low-key interviewed her for about half an hour before Tim started asking for nudes. Sadly, I don’t remember much after that. Honestly, I don’t remember driving home, but here I am writing about trannies. Once again, gotta stop incriminating myself online. The next morning, Tim and I are texting back and forth recapping what happened at the party that night. I asked him if he ever got nudes from Emelia. "So she used to be a he and them pictures are horrible", Tim replied. I couldn't believe it. "Hold up that was a tranny?", I asked. "She ain't got the dick she used to have", Tim replied "Fuckouttahere", I said "Promise", Tim said
Stay #woke fam
I cried laughing in disbelief. How could I not know I was talking to a tranny the whole night about pegging? Why would a male-to-female trans-gendered person be so into pegging? Like, why even cut your dick off if youre just gonna end up getting another one? Kinda? It didn't make sense to me and it still doesn't to this day. Not that there's anything wrong with it, but can someone please explain the logic to me because it seems backwards as fuck. Anyway, I say all that to say this, compliments to the chef on the transition Emelia. Most importantly stay woke at parties, y'all.
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